Monday, June 25, 2007

xvii Years Ago Today, Rasslin'

xvii years ago today my dad took me to the Charleston (West Virginia) Civic Center to see a taping of Wrestling Challenge. There was a loaded card that night:

  • "The Million Dollar Man" Ted DiBiase d. Rugged Ronnie Garvin.
  • The Legion of Doom made its WWF debut in a jobber match.

  • (KISS) - (really shitty music) = (Demolition, the coolest tag team ever)
    Demolition turned heel.
  • Jake "the Snake" Roberts d. Bad News Brown. This means I got to see the DDT--the greatest rasslin' move ever--in person. And I got to see Jake the Snake put a snake on an unconscious black guy.
  • The Big Boss Man d. Ted DiBiase
  • I met Tugboat.
  • The Bushwackers defeated a team of jobbers. I got to rub Bushwacker Luke's head. My hands smell like Cane's sauce to this day.
  • Dusty Rhodes and Sapphire (with Miss Elizabeth in their corner) d. "Macho King" Randy Savage and Sensational Sherri (with Brother Love in their corner).
  • WWF Champion Ultimate Warrior d. Ravishing Rick Rude.
Conspicuously absent were The Rockers, about whom I recently discovered something amusing.

Here's their action figure set:



The situation is already pretty queer since Marty and Shawn look kind of like two of my mom's sisters who are some of the most successful bar flies in the history of Caldwell Parish. But check out the bottom right corner, where it indicates Shawn Michaels' finishing move:



The Rocker Shocker? Dude. And look even more closely--you can't see what the left hand of the rendered Michaels is doing. Looks like it's "two in the wetty, one in the Jannetty" or "two in the Marty, one in the farty."

2 comments:

Unique King said...

who do you think is the gayer rocker. sean or marty

Adam David Wilson said...

Marty.